Motherhood, parenting, Uncategorized

An open letter to the girl I was before “mama”

Your days will no longer be carefree and whimsy will begin to scare you. You will find sprinkles of freedom here and there, but you’ll also realize you no longer yearn to be free like before. You prefer to be home. You will still explore, but you won’t wander as far as you used to. Your adventures will no longer be about you — and that’s okay. You actually like it that way. You will find joy in her curiosity. You will find peace in her smile. Your late nights will look a little different. There will be tears and you will be tired. Some nights you will sit and wonder if the morning will ever come. I promise you it does. The sun always comes out again.

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Let’s talk postpartum — the real stuff

I watched another mom endure the same things I did during my own postpartum recovery. The things that made me feel weak, alone, and worthless. The things no one likes to talk about. The messy things. The gross things. The real things. I watched the mom in this ad over and over again. I admired her strength, her grace, and her perseverance. I yearned so badly to help her, even if it meant simply reassuring her that everything she is going through is normal and that it will soon pass. As I watched this mom again and again, an amazing thing happened — I began to see myself. I was no longer watching a stranger struggle through the woes of postpartum — I was watching me. I was admiring my own strength. My own grace. And my own perseverance. This ad — and the feelings it gave me — have inspired me to share the raw and messy details of my physical recovery with you — especially the things that I was not prepared for after childbirth.

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The only thing I did today was love you

The crumbs stayed in their places all day. The dishes piled up in the sink. The laundry from the wash never made it into the dryer. And the clean laundry sat in the basket for another day. Lunch was nothing special, either. Macaroni does just fine on days like today. Your toys were strewn about the house and I didn’t bother to put them away. To save some time, I’ll just say my to-do list stayed undone. But I didn’t do nothing today.

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New parents shouldn’t have to ask for help

There was no room in my new mom brain for anything else. I was definitely hungry. We all were exhausted. There were dishes and laundry to be done, toilets to be scrubbed, and showers to be had. But I didn’t have time to think about how those things were going to be taken care of.”… Continue reading New parents shouldn’t have to ask for help

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I gave my exclusively-breastfed daughter formula — and I’m glad I did

I was so determined to make it through her first year of life without ever needing to supplement.” Today was hard. No, today was more than hard. Today beat me. And it beat me badly. It was just one of those days. I woke up and immediately things were going awry. First, I woke up… Continue reading I gave my exclusively-breastfed daughter formula — and I’m glad I did

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Please don’t tell me my husband is “a good helper”

So the next time you see my husband pushing the stroller through the aisles of Target or changing our daughter’s diaper in the back of our SUV in the parking lot — please don’t tell me he is such a good helper, because I won’t agree.” My husband is a great dad. But he is… Continue reading Please don’t tell me my husband is “a good helper”